I came across this word twice on Sunday, in a devotional and in church.
It is a word that I have never thought much about, but have seen multiple times in my Bible and it is a word that probably most accurately describes this current time of my life.
The word selah appears over 70 times in the Bible, mainly in the Psalms and while it does not have a clearly defined meaning it is typically thought to be a pause, a moment to reflect. Particularly because of it’s use in the Psalms, it’s thought to be a suspension of music (Biblehub).
I love it for both those reasons, that it is a pause and moment to let the music sink in, but also that it is a word that no one is 100% sure of the definition.
Because that’s exactly what this unexpected time of unemployment feels like a time of pause and reflection, but also I have no idea what it really is.
So what am I reflecting on?
Well, I’ve realized that I’m in a wonderfully happy period of life, joy and gratitude carry me through the day no matter what happens. Although sometimes in happy moments I get nervous wondering when the hard stuff will come again, but I try not to get lost in that fear. It’s not helpful and only works to take away from the joy I have today.
And I realized that since college my day to day life has slowed down a lot. There was a time where all this free time would have driven me crazy and I would have found a class and things to sign up for just so I wouldn’t have any free time. I think about how in one day I used to spend time with friends, do homework, run a meeting, go to two classes, chapel, a late night event, then wake up at 6 the next day chipper as anything ready to do it all over again.
Today? I worked on our budget, responded to a few texts and emails, did some errands and made a dessert for tonight. Now I’m working on this and looking forward to my husband coming home from work. I used to make such big to do lists and granted college demands a lot of work (but I always found more things to do). I know now that the laundry really can be done tomorrow. I know that yeah, we all have responsibilities, but it really is okay to pick three manageable things to do in one day and let the rest go until tomorrow.
So despite the go go nature of American culture I’m appreciating this time of selah. This time of rest and reflection, especially knowing at the end of it I’m going into a job I think I’m really going to enjoy.
What I hope is that I can remember this slower pace of life when I’m knee deep in full time work, getting hangrier by the second, and spending time with my husband might feel more like a burden than a gift; in those moments I hope I will remember selah. I hope I will remember that my life is a gift and that it’s okay to just eat PB&J if that means I’ll have more time to just be with and enjoy my husband. Life is too short to not enjoy it which means spending time on what matters and letting the laundry suffer for a day or three is okay–as you can see doing laundry is my personal challenge.
I hope no matter what’s going on in your life right now you take some time to reflect on what is good and lovely and embracing those things, because a stressed, tense, bitter, life isn’t much of a life at all.