What’s one of the most significant differences between being a single college student, and a married post grad? How I use and view my time.
While in college, I could be lazy with time, but so much of it was for me and my life was so centralized that it just wasn’t a big deal if I took a little more time to do something, if I had somewhere to go it wasn’t too far away. By second semester I was dating S, but time was really devoted to me and my pursuits, I only made time for S because I wanted to.
Now time is a commodity and there just doesn’t seem enough of it though I do less to some extent than I did as a college student. Now with my job in another city, a husband, friends, and my own personal pursuits, it seems I never have quite enough time to do everything. Like today I was going to work on some cover letters, but I got home late because of T delays, then I helped make dinner (by the way sweet potato ravioli is so delicious, we got it from our local farmers market, SO GOOD), followed by making cards for upcoming birthdays, before I knew it 9 PM was rolling around. Of course I could be working on cover letters instead of blogging, but I try not to do work stuff after 8, it’s just not a productive experience.
And then there is the whole having a husband thing. He works second shift, so I have a lot of time without him at nights, but we’re still navigating how we spend our free time in the mornings and on the weekends. Because our marriage is really important and needs to be prioritized if we’re going to be in it for the long haul.
So time is really essential in the post grad life. Using your time wisely is how you pursue your goals, manage what’s most important to you, and keep yourself sane. I really respect times of rest and reflection in a way I didn’t as a college student. I take moments to just drink deeply of my cocoa, to look at something beautiful, or just sit with someone I care about. And now I’m also looking for ways to use my time a bit better and nurture my pursuits more.
I have a LONG commute, it’s roughly 1.5 hours (though sometimes only an hour), and I have 3 switches. I start on a bus, to the orange line, followed by the red line. I’m committing my first stint on the orange line to writing. I’m going to use my time on the bus to observe and imagine (since writing on the bus is just bumpy), and soon as I have a seat on the T I’m going to write till I have to switch. It’s my small way of making more time for my writing, myself, and using my time a little better. Previously I was using that time to read, and trust me I will still be using plenty of my commute to read, but I hope this small act of writing will help to give me some more creativity and nourish that aspect of myself.
In college I think because my goals were so clearly outlined: get your degree–now sometimes it’s hard to use my time well because I’m not totally sure what I’m pursuing. Doing homework was a given because if I didn’t I’d get a lower grade, which means I’d potentially fail the class, which means I’m wasting time and money, which meant I was increasing the odds that I wouldn’t get the degree. In life, beyond be happy and don’t be homeless, it’s so easy to lose track. So easy to slack off with writing because being a writer is not something that has a straightforward path in the way getting my degree was. Plus basically my main goal was getting my degree, and not too many responsibilities, now not so much.
I have to work, I have friendships, I have my church and family, my dear husband, chores, on top of wanting to move up in my career, pursue writing, read, and my personal hobbies. Not to mention a thriving relationship with God, I probably should exercise, and cooking good food takes time. Thankfully much like college, I do have a lot of support from God who fills me daily with his love and grace, my husband who doles out as much forgiveness as he does sass (a lot to clarify), my housemates who make me warm meals and give out lots of grace when it comes to living together and navigating chores, and the many people in my life who offer friendship, love, and prayers.
So that is my focus for this week and especially the upcoming month of October, how can I use my time more wisely? How can I balance my varying relationships and responsibilities and still do the stuff I need to do for myself, like writing and cover letters?
I hope I can step up to the challenge, and as always I intend to do with ample amounts of grace and glitter.
All the best,