Settling in

I think a lot of times when we think about transitions we think about the big moments: the wedding day, graduation day, moving day, the day the baby is born (its birthday!), the day of the holiday, getting engaged all those clamoring big moments that, granted, are really important.

More often I’m finding what really makes something a transition is the lead up and the settling in afterwards. That big moment is wonderful, so wonderful. You need it honestly. Despite the 7 months that have passed since graduation, every time I see my pictures, am reminded of that day, or see my diploma I am filled with joy. That day was one of those few and wonderful perfect days. There was nothing wrong with that day, it was just pure and simple joy, surrounded by people who loved me and were so proud of me.

Afterwards though that’s where I had to slowly develop who I was going to be after college. I think for some people it’s easier, but for four years my school was a part of my identity. In the best way possible. It was my home. Where my friends were, where I worked, it was almost everything. And suddenly (though with great pomp and circumstance) it was time for me to move on. At least to some extent.

As you know I’m still quite involved at my alum. I have many good friends and acquaintances there. My fiance works there. I’m a teaching assistant there, and I’m part of the Women in the Bible play (speaking of which I officially decided to perform in it next semester, pray for me, it’s going to stretch me, and I’m going to be exhausted, but I think it’s going to be worth it). So I’m still more involved than I thought I would be.

Now I’m praying about possibly seeking work, closer to where I live, perhaps right in the heart of Boston (still my biggest dream).

But with moving out of my family’s home (and I’ve talked to them once a day since moving, not even on purpose), I’m figuring out slowly how that life will look.

The balance of my friends, my roommates, and my family. Creating routines. Figuring out how to eat every day, maybe one of these days I really will cook something besides breakfast and sandwiches (don’t count on it). Figuring out the bus system (really convenient so far).

I’m just doing my best to stay present and when it makes sense to say yes. Like last night I got home fairly early so me and two of my roommates went to Target and Barnes and Noble and it was really nice just to get to know them better and hang out with them for a few hours. I could have just stayed at the house in my room, called my friends, did some grading (but really I did need to get on that!), but I chose to say yes and take advantage of being present with the people I live with. I don’t doubt I won’t have more times to say yes in the future, but I’m glad I said yes then.

It’s so crazy how I’ve grown, freshmen Juanita would have shuddered at living with strangers, and to a certain extent I still do. Yet the Juanita who I am now has so much more faith and it’s awesome. Faith in God, faith in herself, faith in others. I decided after one meeting with them, on the word of a very dear friend, and a feeling of transcendent peace to move in with three women I don’t know from Eve. And so far it’s working out. Day by day I see my life unfolding. It’s pretty scary, but from the day I came to my alum and I told God I didn’t think I could commute and succeed at my school he has been more than faithful. Doesn’t mean things have always been easy, even this hasn’t been entirely easy (hello, now I really have to live on a budget), but he has always been faithful and as long as I’m seeking him, he’s always there to guide me.

So trust in that readers, the truly wonderful thing is that we don’t have to do it alone, God is more than happy to pour on the glitter and get the glory from our shine.

And when your in the midst of transition, be present with it. Say yes, take a chance, have an adventure, and have faith.

Glitter on,

Juanita

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One thought on “Settling in

  1. Thank You so much for this post, Juanita! Really calmed me down and centered me within the craziness right now. So thankful for your gift of words and sharing your thoughts! :]

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